Back to the Drawing Board...Maybe

As you know, Dear Blog Readers, I am an optimist by nature and tend to use this platform as a place of encouragement and support. While my view of the publishing industry may seem overly sunny at times, it's because my six years of working in NYC exposed me to many of the smart, well-intentioned, passionate people who work in the industry. Everyone I've ever met who works in publishing is crazy about books and getting good manuscripts into the hands of readers. I like to mention this as often as I can because it pains me to hear these people being repeatedly maligned by those who have little understanding of what really goes on in Big Publishing.

That being said, things can and do go wrong--and I would be remiss to gloss over the bad times. If I'm here to share my experience of the writing life, then I have to be honest when things get tough. Since we writers can be competitive and a little bit protective of our reputations, I think there's a tendency for us to avoid talking about failure. Maybe we don't want to appear vulnerable. Still, we do each other a disservice when pretend we everything is rosy all the time.

As I wrote in a previous post ("The Summer of Crazy"), last May I turned in my first draft of a novel I've been working on in fits and starts since my twins were born ten years ago. At the time, it felt terrific to finally complete something after being out of the publishing world for so long. I was sure it was my strongest work to date and was thrilled to finally show it to my agent. Unfortunately, my agent didn't share my enthusiasm. I cried for two days.

When we discussed the story at length, he raved about the writing but thought the plot needed some work. His comments were insightful and on the money. I felt better--energized and ready to get back to work. I did a round of revisions, pretty sure that I fixed all his points of concern.

I was wrong.

We had another discussion and this time I felt a little fuzzier about what I was supposed to aim for. I did a second round of revisions. I took an ax to the manuscript. It still fell short.

Third round of revisions. This time I felt like I was completely in the dark. I was losing confidence and interest. I was beginning to go against my own instincts. We both knew this was bad news. In the end, my agent's verdict was the same: it wasn't coming together the way he would like. Time to put it aside. Did I have any other stories to develop?

This was really tough news to hear. How could I possibly toss away something I've spent so much time and effort on, especially when I felt this was my best work and that maybe, just maybe he was wrong? I cried--though much less than the first time around--thinking about all the time I'd lost and how the manuscript wasn't any closer to publication. I went to war with myself, considering my options:

Should I....

1) Throw in the towel? Every author has a book or two in their closet that had to be scrapped. This will be mine.

But I can't imagine giving up on this story. This is some of the best stuff I've ever written. My gut tells me that one way or another, something from this manuscript will be published.



2) Cannibalize the story? I could chop the novel up into separate short stories or use a character for something new so it wouldn't feel like a complete waste of time.

This is a realistic solution, but something I'd like to avoid having to do. 



3) Step away from it for a while? Maybe if I put it aside for at least six months I could gain a little clarity and figure out on my own what needed to be fixed.

Aside from losing more time, this is a good plan. 



4) Get a second opinion? Share it with a few trusted readers to get their take on it. If they feel the same way my agent does, then I'll have to really do some soul-searching.

Yes! Other opinions are exactly what I need right now. It can help me make an informed decision about what to do next.



5) Get a new agent? Maybe it's time to find someone else who can better articulate what the story needs or whose vision is closer to mine.

Something to consider, but not something I'm inclined to do. Aside from this hiccup, we have a good relationship and I trust him. Plus, he's a top agent. Trying to find another agent is a big risk on many levels. 


So, after thinking it over a bit, my plan was to set it aside for a while and come back to it in six months with fresh eyes. 

Then, an interesting thing happened: I met with my writing group. I had been giving them a few scenes at a time to get their opinions and the response was overwhelmingly positive. They seemed to love the characters and were very invested in the story. They couldn't wait to read the rest and wanted me to send all of it at once instead of in dribs and drabs. I couldn't believe it....and I was more confused than ever.

Suddenly, I found myself unable to put the story aside. I contacted a friend of mine who is a novelist and he offered to take a look. I'll be interested in hearing his point of view. I have a feeling he'll be a 'tiebreaker' of sorts and his feedback will give me a better sense of how to proceed.

In the meantime, I'm polishing an old short story I've been wanting to finish and hope to send it around in a few weeks. It will be nice to have something else to think about for a while.

Have you encountered a big setback in your writing career? How did you move forward?

Company and a Deadline

The book club I belong to just finished reading NIGHT CIRCUS by Erin Morgenstern. It's a beautifully written novel about a circus that appears out of nowhere in the middle of the night. The visual and fantasy elements are just breathtaking. I don't want to give anything away, so let's just say that this is Morgenstern's first novel and it is so highly accomplished for a young writer that I can't wait to see what she'll do next.

During the course of the book club's discussion, one of the members mentioned that NIGHT CIRCUS had been a NaNoWriMo project. For those of you who are unfamiliar with NaNoWriMo, it stands for National Novel Writing Month--which just so happens to be November. Writers who are up for the challenge pledge to write 50,000 words during the course of the month. For accountability and commiseration, you can register your project at the NaNoWriMo website and discuss your work on the message boards.

When it was revealed that NIGHT CIRCUS was a NaNoWriMo project, the reaction among the book club members was interesting. "She wrote all this in a month?" one woman said, waving the thick novel in the air. The members were astounded by such a feat but fully believed it was possible. The two writers in the group (I, being one of them) shook our heads. "No, she didn't," we assured them. "You can't write something like that in a month."

But how could I be so sure? Just because I couldn't pull it off doesn't mean someone else wasn't capable of it. I mean, anything is possible, right? Literary history is peppered with stories of writers hitting a vein just right and having the story pour out in one quick burst. Still, it was highly unlikely. If the book club believed it was possible to complete a novel in a month, then I started thinking that many NaNoWriMo writers must believe the same thing. It begs the question, "Just how much did Erin Morgenstern manage to write in a month?

Apparently, I'm not the only reader who's wondered the same thing, because Morgenstern's website has a FAQ page that addresses the NaNoWriMo question. Basically, she participated in the NaNoWriMo challenge over the course of three Novembers and then took the writing she produced and spent the next two years discovering the story. During that time, the manuscript went through countless changes. In fact, Morgenstern says that she wrote over 100,000 words that don't even contain the main character of the finished novel.

I'm not going to say "Told you so"...but....

Morgenstern writes on her website: "I think NaNoWriMo is a brilliant idea and gives you two magical things: company and a deadline."

Well put. All this, fellow writers, is a roundabout way of saying that while the NaNoWriMo challenge is a valuable exercise, it's important to keep it in a proper perspective. If you are expecting to produce a finished manuscript by the end of the month, you will most likely be disappointed. Doing so would verge on the superhuman. The one goal to keep in mind is to produce a lot of words and to push forward without listening to the inner perfectionist that loves to keep you paralyzed with self-doubt. If you work hard, at the end of the month you will end up a wonderful jumping off point. And that's when the real work begins. Who knows? Maybe you'll write something as wonderful as NIGHT CIRCUS.

Are you participating in NaNoWriMo? Have you had success with it? What is the value of it for you?

Stories Are Fragile--Handle With Care

So, I've finally finished the first draft of my next novel. I call it a first draft because it's finally a complete piece, but the reality is that I revise many times as I go along so this is probably my tenth, twentieth, thirtieth draft--who knows? I've lost count. For publishing purposes, though, this is called the first draft. And there will be many, many more to come. 

Still, there is much reason to celebrate. After nine years of trying to write this book while raising twins, I've finally manage to finish it. As a reward I gave myself a week off from writing and turned my attention to friends and household projects I've been neglecting. Now my break is over and it's time to start writing something new while I wait to hear back from my agent. 

Waiting is so painful, but it's a fact of life in the publishing business. Publishing is one of the slowest, most archaic industries around. It takes a lot of time for an agent or an editor read a 400+ page manuscript while handling all the other urgent business that's always cropping up--phone calls, deadlines, meetings. If only agents and editors had USB ports connected to their heads, we could download our manuscripts directly to their brains and the whole process would move along a lot faster. Until that day comes, we writers will just have to learn to have a little patience. 

One of the reasons I find it so hard to wait is that basically my agent is my first reader. I've shared a few scenes here and there when I needed a little boost, but basically no one has seen it or heard much about it for nearly ten years. I feel like I've been holding a burning secret and finally, finally, I can tell someone. 

During my little celebratory vacation, I had a few lunches with fellow writing friends and the topic of sharing vs. not sharing came up. Writers, I think, are given mixed-messages regarding sharing. We often encourage writers to join writers' groups and workshops to get feedback. On the whole, it's pretty good advice. Appreciating and critiquing the work of others strengthens our own work; receiving criticism opens our minds and prepares us for working with editors and handling reviews. There is a point, however, when sharing becomes counter-productive. 

For example, one of my friends joined a writers' group and found that the group wasn't a good fit for her. The members of the group seemed to be on one wavelength and she on another. Thankfully, she had enough belief in herself and her work to recognize that it was best to leave the group instead of becoming discouraged and giving up writing altogether.

Another friend is in the early stages of a novel and has been tempted to show her pages to her spouse. Alarm bells rang in my head when I heard this for two reasons: 1) The most dangerous time to share your work is early on. You're excited about your idea and it's so tempting to tell someone, but in doing so you lose steam. Even simply talking about it relieves some of that built-up urgency that compels us to write, and  2) Sharing a story with a loved one (especially a spouse) is a recipe for hurt feelings. Think about it--who in our lives is capable of hurting us the most? The ones we love. Asking for their approval puts them in a bind. What if they don't react exactly the way you want them to? Even an enthusiastic response might have you questioning their sincerity. Spare yourself the trauma and wait until you're finished the piece and a more objective third party has given you the thumbs-up first. 

Even seasoned writers fall into the "show too soon" trap. A friend of mine who is a published author warned me against the need for early approval from one's agent and editor. He sent a few early drafts to them thinking they would share in his excitement--only to find out they weren't enthusiastic at all. How could they be, when all he showed them was a partial rough draft? Unfortunately, early sharing is often the start of a downward spiral--what you want is encouragement, but what you end up with is indifference. Or worse, disapproval. What a confidence killer. It's hard to finish a piece when you've been crushed by an unfavorable response. 

Do yourself a favor--protect your work at least until the first draft is finished. Avoid even talking about your work if you can bear it. Treat your stories like the fragile things they are. Wait until they're polished and complete and beautiful and then--and only then--show them to the world.

Promises, Promises

Ok, Promising Writers, this post is going to be a major buzzkill. So if you don't think you're in the mood for a reality check, then you may want to duck out now. But if you can handle it--and I think you can--it might be worth your while.

The purpose of this blog is to offer encouragement and advice, but I wouldn't be doing my job if I made everything about the publishing business seem peachy keen, now would I? Every now and again it's important to manage expectations. If you know what to expect, then you aren't so crushed when something unpleasant happens. And it will. It happens to everyone.

Getting published is incredibly exciting, especially for the first time. When I got my first gig as a ghostwriter I was so thrilled I could hardly sleep for weeks. Several years later I developed my own series (ON THE ROAD) that briefly captured the attention of a television production company. I ran on pure adrenaline for months. I count the day my agent sold my first literary adult novel to Simon & Schuster (THE GREATEST MAN IN CEDAR HOLE) as one of the best days of my life.

In the early stages of any deal, there's definitely a honeymoon period when everyone is swooning over your work. Editors and sales staff will praise you. If there is buzz about your manuscript, movie producers might come calling. There might be talk about media appearances, tours, promotions, contests, bestsellers' lists, on and on. It is so easy to be swept up in all the excitement--but don't. I'm sorry to say that much of what is promised or merely mentioned probably will not happen.

So many things can happen that appear to be a sure thing then just dry right up. I once thought I had a twelve book series sold that ended up being cut down to four due to a personnel change in the publishing house. I've been contacted by TV/movie producers who seemed very interested and then never contacted me again. I've heard many publicity campaigns that never came to fruition. One of my foreign publishers thought I might make the bestseller list in that country and my book tanked. I've been told, for sure, that my book was going to be featured in a magazine that virtually makes bestsellers, only to have it cut just before publication. My first big disappointment crushed me for a long time. When the last one happened, I celebrated my 'almost' victory by going out to dinner. I ordered a martini and toasted the magazine that nearly put my name on the literary map.

Cynics like to demonize publishers, but I've hardly encountered anyone in the business that I haven't liked. Nearly everyone I've met is professional, dedicated, and their love of books is very real. So is their excitement when they come upon a project they really love. They, too, can get carried away. They might want to give you all the resources they can to give your book a push, but corporate demands, budgets, and shifting priorities can get in the way. Things just happen. And the truth is, even the best editors really can't predict what will resonate with the public and become a bestseller. A lot of it is largely out of their hands.

So, how can you insulate yourself against disappointment?

Expect the Unexpected. Yes, things will go wrong. To you. To everyone. That's life.

Set Your Expectations Low. It's okay to get excited about potential good news--as long as you keep it in perspective. There's rarely a quick path to wealth and stardom.

Don't Count on Anything Until It's Signed, Sealed, Delivered. Your contract is not valid until it's signed by both parties. Consider any talk of publicity, celebrity blurbs, movie deals, etc. to be merely idle chit-chat until something is actually happening toward that goal. Even then, don't consider it real until it has actually happened. Seriously.

Don't Spend a Dime Until the Check Clears. Tattoo this one on your arm so you don't forget. I used to work in the accounting office of a literary agency and I can't tell you how many authors got themselves in a bind by spending money they didn't have. So what if you just signed a contract for $100,000 advance? It could take months for the publisher to cut you a check. Don't spend a dime until it's actually in your bank account.  And then, if you're really smart, you'll sock away a portion for taxes and save the rest until your manuscript is finished, delivered, and approved. Do you know what happens in that rare instance that the publisher doesn't like your finished work or that you fail to deliver it? You have to give the money back! Not so easy to do, once you've spent it.

Be Grateful. Even when things go wrong, be happy and humble about the things that do go right. Because they will. Many things will go right, things you would never expect. A bookseller might fall in love with your book and spread the word about it. You might win an award. A high-profile newspaper might give you a rave review. A town you've never heard of might choose your book as a community read and ask you to speak. You might become a celebrity in a foreign country.

Prepare yourself. Anything can happen. That's half the fun.