Serve the Work

As 2015 comes to a close, my writing news ends on a high note. After many, many rewrites, Mr. Agent says my manuscript passes muster and we can send it out to publishers in January, after the holiday chaos. I am beside myself with relief and excitement. Just when I came close to giving up on this story, I stuck with it. Maybe the gamble will pay off. Whatever happens, I take comfort in knowing I did my best. I also look forward to finally returning to the business of writing after such a long hiatus and reporting the process to you, dear blog reader, along the way. 

There is one small detail to attend to before Mr. Agent sends out the manuscript. It's a plot point that happens in the third act that he feels needs to be reworked. At first look it seems an easy fix, but as I move deeper into the changes I realize it ripples out and affects many scenes. Whether I make the changes or not is entirely optional and up to me--but his feeling was that since we're waiting until January, why not?

I've given his suggestion a lot of thought and I've decided to go for it. If it doesn't work, we can always revert to the previous version. Part of the reason why I'm taking on the challenge is that the change we came up with together is actually an idea I had pursued many drafts ago, but had abandoned. Why? Because even though the story led me there, it didn't feel literary enough to me. It was too obvious, predictable. I wanted to create something more subtle, nuanced. 

Looking back now, I can see many instances when I tried to steer the story instead of letting it steer me. And what happened? I veered off course. Trying to make the story something it was not cost me a lot of time and pages. 

On a whim, I borrowed a copy of Madeleine L'Engle's WALKING ON WATER: Reflections on Faith and Art from my local library. Shortly after my conversation with my agent I came across the following passage (don't you love it when this happens?) which refers to her process of working on A WRINKLE IN TIME, her masterpiece:

"I began to comprehend something about listening to the work, about going where it shoved me. And so the long two years of rejection slips which followed were especially difficult; it wasn't just that my work was being rejected; or, if it was, it meant that I had not even begun to serve the work."

Serve the work. Yes. This is what I've been learning. When we get in the way of a piece by trying to make it something it is not--either by deciding the story isn't lofty enough or it's in a particular genre we don't care for--we ruin it. Our job as writers is to accept the story as is and let it guide us into being. Our choice, our art, comes from how we tell that story. This is where we can let our heads rules our hearts. 

Is there a story you're stuck on? Think for a moment--are you trying to make it something it's not?

See you in 2016.

9 Great Gifts for Writers (2015 Edition)

It's time for my annual roundup of 9 Great Gifts for Writers. While I mostly create  this list in service to my readers, it also use it as a thinly-veiled wish list for any of my loved ones who read this blog. Happy shopping *wink, wink*!

Blackwing Pencils.  On last year's list I extolled the virtues of a smooth-writing, medium point pen but this year I rediscovered the beauty of the pencil. And not just any pencil. After reading BETWEEN YOU & ME: CONFESSIONS OF A COMMA QUEEN by Mary Norris and learning of the devoted following the Blackwing had (especially among editors of The New Yorker) I just had to try them out.  They are expensive ($21.95 for a pack of 12), but so worth it. The pencil is extra long and the Palomino model is painted in a shiny slate metallic color. When it's in your hand it just feels special. The writing is smooth and the erasing clean--the eraser is rectangular and flat and slides out as needed so you don't run out of eraser before you run out of pencil. I loved these so much that I started using them all the time instead of my beloved gel pens. One word of advice: make sure to buy the special 2-step pencil sharpener ($7.50) made for it.

Litographs. I have a niece who is an avid reader and who just earned her doctorate in entomology. Her favorite color is orange. I was searching for the perfect gift to celebrate her achievement and came across this amazing company. Litographs takes classic works of literature and creates graphics using the text of the work. How cool is that? They put the graphics on t-shirts, tote bags, and posters. For my niece, I bought a print of Kafka's THE METAMORPHOSIS, which is in the shape of a giant bug, and chose to have it printed in orange. She loved it. I'm partial to Thoreau's Walden, pictured above. ($24-$39)


Gift Certificate from an Independent Bookstore. This year I made a concerted effort to buy fewer books from a certain online mega-retailer and more books from my local bookstore. By purchasing from independent bookstores you are supporting your local economy and saying no to predatory practices that hurt all writers. Any writer in your life would be thrilled to have some mad money to spend at the neighborhood bookstore.

Grammar Nerd Shirt.  I'm no expert when it comes to grammar (as you've probably noticed) but like most writers I do have certain grammatical pet peeves. This is my new favorite t-shirt until I find a snarky one that shows the proper use of the possessive. ($27.95)

Bookish Candles.  The scent description of these soy-based candles makes me swoon--paper, dust, newsprint, vanilla. Other scents include Oxford Library, The Shire, and Sherlock's Study, which smells of pipe tobacco, cherrywood, and fresh rain. ($18 each)

Scapple. No, this is not the cousin of the famous Pennsylvania Dutch breakfast treat but a poorly-named program from Literature & Latte--the makers of Scrivener--my all-time favorite word-processing program. Although I have yet to purchase this particular product, it's on my to-do list. The next project I'm working on is research-heavy and this mind-mapping software should help with plotting, note-taking, character development, and making thematic connections. Literature & Latte offers a free trial period, but at $15, it's a minimal investment.

One Story Magazine. Co-founded by a former Writers House colleague of mine, Hannah Tinti, One Story is a unique literary magazine that simply publishes one story every three weeks. Contributing authors only get published once, allowing for the discovery of new talent. Subscriptions are available in both print and digital formats, or you can purchase single back issues of you favorite authors. Fun fact: Maine's own Lily King is featured in the latest issue. (12 issues for $21)

Thermos. I've never been to a writers' colony, but I'm a little obsessed with the idea of spending a month or two in the woods of New Hampshire at the MacDowell Colony. Spending a couple of weeks in a cabin with nothing to do but read, write, sleep, and eat from MacDowell's legendary picnic baskets that are delivered right to your door. Those picnic baskets reportedly come with a thermos full of coffee to keep you at your writerly best. Since my children are still too young to have me running off for weeks at a time and since my backyard in the Maine woods basically looks like the MacDowell campus, I won't be applying anytime soon. Instead, I've made my own pseudo-retreat by filling up this thermos with my favorite hot beverage and heading out to my kids' play house to write. It's not quite the same, but at least my coffee stays hot for 12+ hours. ($23)

Wise and Otherwise. I received this board game as a gift a few years ago. Players are given the first half of an obscure saying or proverb and must finish the rest of it. Everyone's answers are read aloud (including the original ending of the proverb) and then players must vote on the most convincing answer. Players with good writing skills tend to do well--which is why it's become one of my all-time favorite games. Not that I'm competitive or anything. ($42)

Getting Into the Groove

I just received a really nice note from a Goodreads friend named Alex who has the itch to write but doesn't know how to start.

We've all been there, haven't we? Think about all the skills you've learned over your lifetime--reading, riding a bike, cooking a pot of pasta, driving a car--and what it felt like at first. The word that comes to my mind is overwhelming. I remember, vividly, my first driving lesson: hands on the wheel trying to steer, foot on the gas (or brake, more often), eyes bouncing from the road to the mirrors to the dashboard, my brain on overload. It seemed impossible that I would ever be able to drive with ease. But eventually I did--and I never would have if I hadn't gotten behind the wheel in the first place.

And so it is with writing. You'll learn by doing. The trouble is that learning to write, or learning to create any kind of art, feels different than other skills because our thoughts and feelings are so exposed. Emotionally, there's more at stake. We're afraid of appearing idiotic or dull to others--or, even worse--to ourselves. Spoiler alert: No matter who you are, at one time or another both are going to happen. But you will also experience moments of joy when you turn out work that surpasses your expectations. If ups and downs are a given for all of us, why not stop fretting and just get to work?

Whether you're picking up a pen for the first time or returning after a long hiatus, here are a few baby steps to help you get into the groove. 


Step 1.  Buy yourself a beautiful notebook and a bunch of your favorite pens. 

Even if you think you'd rather work on a computer, I urge you not to skip this step. For the first several months it's best to stick with paper and pen. Nothing is more discouraging than a blinking cursor, or more distracting than knowing the Internet is just a tab-click away. Lovely paper and a smooth-writing pen are a pleasure to use. By purchasing good writing materials, you are making a commitment to taking yourself seriously as a writer.


Step 2.  Schedule your writing time.

No matter how busy you are, I guarantee you can find ten minutes a day to write. You can either block out the same time every day or you can choose to be flexible--as long as your ten minutes are done by bedtime. No excuses. For the first month, I recommend sticking to ten minutes only. Even if you're on a roll and could write for an hour, shut it down after ten minutes. It's always best to stop when you're hot--it makes it a lot easier to sit down and write the next day. In fact, it will make you look forward to writing the next day. Getting the motivation to sit down and write is half the battle.

After the first month or so, up your time to fifteen minutes. Then twenty. Settle into a block of time that is comfortable for you. Most writers I know only write for a maximum of about four hours a day. How long you write for is less important than keeping a consistent schedule. Some writers insist that you must write every day. Personally, I take weekends off. If your schedule allows you to only write on weekends, do that.


Step 3.  Give yourself permission to be bad. 

Oh, the hours I wasted, staring at a blank screen, afraid to write a single bad sentence! It would have been so much better to just give myself permission to write the worst possible sentence and then fix it later. You can't edit what isn't there. Every writer writes junky first drafts. The real art, the real skill is in the editing. You have to write garbage--a lot of it--to get to the good stuff. To learn how to write, you'll need to be a garbage-producing machine. In my college oeuvre of junk-writing I produced a schmaltzy story entitled "Pink Soap and Lilacs", that still makes me want to gag whenever I think about it. I will not be sharing the awful details of this particular story with you, which brings me to the next step:


Step 4.  Don't share with anyone--yet.

As you begin to churn out your requisite pile of word-sludge you may suddenly strike gold. You might suddenly hit upon an idea for a nail-biting thriller or you may turn out an exquisite sentence that makes you proud. Your instinct will be to share it with someone, but I urge you to keep it to yourself. As I've said over and over again, you will rarely get the ecstatic reaction you are hoping for and early on your writer's ego will be too fragile to handle it. When you find a golden nugget in your junk pile, hoard it. Keep this treasure for yourself. Keep hoarding your literary gold until you have enough of it to feel confident in your ability. If it pleases you, that's all that matters.


Step 5.  Read, read, read. 

When I got my first ghost-writing job, I still wasn't quite sure how to intersperse dialogue with action.   I wasn't even sure how to properly punctuate dialogue. To learn how, all I did was open a book and see how it was done. Every book is an instruction manual. Unsure how to open a story? Or create suspense at the end of a chapter? What about using page breaks? Everything you need to know is sitting on your bookshelf. Take down a few of your favorite books and see how it's done. I still do this all the time.

You should also be constantly reading for pleasure. Read what you like, not what you think you're supposed to read. Fill your head with words and they will be accessible to you when you need them.


Moving Forward

Once you've practiced enough to produce a rough draft of a short story or several chapters of a novel, then you might want to consider finding a writers' group in your area. Don't rush this step, but when you're ready writers' groups can be an invaluable resource for every skill level. For more info on choosing (or starting) the right group for you, see my post about writing groups.

Do you have a question about writing or publishing? Leave a comment and I'll do my best to answer it in a future post. 

Happy writing!

No Downtime For You!

I'm back!

I've finally finished my latest draft and turned it in to my agent. If you're a regular reader of this blog, thank you for hanging in there with me. I hope to be posting more regularly for a while. Finishing a draft is intense--for the past two months nearly everything else in my world has fallen by the wayside. I've managed to feed and clothe my family, but that's about it. Now I can breathe a little and clean my house, have coffee with friends, go out to lunch with my mom, get ready for the holidays.

So the process will go like this: Mr. Agent will read this version of the manuscript. He may or may not suggest further revisions. If this version of the manuscript is fine as is, he will then shop it around to various publishers. If a publisher is interested, they will make an offer. Then there will be contract negotiations. After that, the real work begins.

There's a huge amount of downtime in publishing. The steps I just described above might take several months. If you're an impatient or obsessive person--which is probably 99% of us--the publishing industry is enough to send you over the edge. What you need to do to is kick up your feet, sip a margarita, and wait for the phone to ring while basking in the glory of your achievement. You've been working hard, haven't you? You deserve to do nothing for a while--so turn on that TV, grab some salty snacks, and get down to some serious binge-watching...

Not!  

To hijack the words of that immortal Seinfeld character: "No downtime for you!"

The worst thing you can do is sit around waiting for something to happen. You have to start the next thing immediately to save your sanity. It's even better if you're so excited about the next thing that the manuscript you just turned in seems old and tired and you're sick of it. The new thing should be so shiny and sparkly and full of promise that it's all you can think about. I know it sounds like a drag to have to keep going but trust me--this is the worst possible time to take a break. You can goof off later once you have your new project well underway.

I'm thrilled to say I have just such an idea in my back pocket. I also have a short story I've been picking at for a long time that I've been eager to finish. And, of course, I have this blog. These things will be more than enough to occupy me in the coming months.

Now if I could just stop checking my email.

In the meantime, are there any topics you'd like me to cover in a future blog post? Post your publishing or writing questions here and I'll do my best to answer them for you. 

Thanks so much for taking the time to read my blog.

It's All About Follow-Through

I'm coming to the end of a significant revision of my manuscript--the last one, I hope, until I have a book contract. If you're a regular reader of this blog you'll know the first draft took me close to ten years to finish (not because it's a work of epic genius but because of family commitments) and I've spent the past year going through multiple revisions. I am more than ready to move on.

I already know what my next project will be and I'm really itching to get started on the research. I have a couple of books on the subject and every now and then I look at them with longing and think,  "I could just do a little reading--what's the harm in that?"

But I know better.

The minute I start dipping into the research for the new idea I'm going to stop being interested in the project I'm currently working on. Odds are the new idea is so seductive because I'm approaching the final act of my current novel and it terrifies me. On a subconscious level, I want to be distracted. If I get distracted, I won't finish; if I don't finish, I don't have to face the possibility that no one will publish it.

This is a problem that all writers fall prey to now and then. Just when one story starts getting tough, a new and more exciting idea pops up that suddenly begs for attention. It's no coincidence. Your subconscious is protecting you from failure. It's also keeping you from success.

There comes a point when, in order to progress, a writer must stop beginning projects and start finishing them. This is the true test of a writer's mettle. This is what separates the amateurs from the pros. Anyone can start a story and call themselves a writer--but how many actually see it through to the end of the first draft? Not many. How many know when they've finished enough revisions to take the leap and send it out to an agent or publisher? Fewer still. It's much easier to let a half-finished piece sit in the drawer or start something new than to risk rejection.

When you start to have the itch to begin a new project--pay attention. Instead of giving in to the urge, use that desire to finish your current project. Make it a reward. Tell yourself you can start that next story as soon as you finish the one you're working on. Follow-through is one of the most important parts of the process.

Do you use new projects as a way to avoid finishing a piece? Do you revise a piece over and over and never send it out? What are the ways you keep yourself from taking the next step?

Don't Speed Date Your Characters

I'm back! I can't believe I haven't posted since July. As you could probably tell by my mid-summer lament, I didn't meet my goal of finishing my rewrite by the end of summer. It was too difficult to concentrate on my kids and my work at the same time. When given the choice my kids will always come first. I put away my laptop for the rest of the summer, forgave myself for not meeting my deadline, and spent my time playing games and having water fights instead.

Now that school's back in session, I'm right back on schedule. I'm nearly finished rewriting 2/3 of the book. My new goal for completion is the end of October.

So, where were we?

A while back, I promised a post about getting to know your characters. That seems like a good place to start.

Sometimes when writers talk about getting to know their characters, we treat the exercise like speed dating. We sit down and knock off a list of traits in the span of a few minutes. To show you what I mean, I'm going to set a timer for two minutes and come up with a character from scratch. Ready, set, go...

Character Name: Krista Mahoney

-Female
-22 years old
-Short brown hair, bangs
-Blue eyes
-Small build, sometimes mistaken for a teen
-Crooked smile
-Wears bulky clothes she can "hide" in
-Parents are divorced, one brother
-Dropped out of college after one semester
-Likes cats
-Works at an ice cream shop
-Shy
-Has no significant other
-Likes to read mysteries
-Eats a tuna sandwich every day for lunch
-Crawls under the bed during thunderstorms

Okay for two minutes work, I guess. Notice the kind of details I came up with--most of them are superficial. She's a little compelling but a bit of a stereotype. Could I write a story about her? Sure, but I don't have much to work with.

This list, dear blog reader, would not be enough information to know if you wanted to date someone in the real world, let alone spend time with them in a fictional one. A person or a character, is more than just a list of traits and likes/dislikes. Rather than just quickly sketching out the basics, getting to know your character should be more like those long, all night phone calls with a new crush; where you don't want to hang up so you ask every conceivable question that comes to mind. To truly know your character, to fall in love (which is a necessity for good writing!) you need to take some time and dig deeper. You need to know the answer to the following questions:

-What does this character want above all else?
-What is she willing to do to get it?
-What is she willing to lose?
-What does she need?
-How are her wants and needs in conflict with one another?
-What does she value most?
-What is her major weakness?
-How does she hide this weakness?
-What in her past makes her this way?
-What, internally, is getting in the way of her getting the goal?
-What, externally, is getting in the way of her getting the goal?
-What event causes her to change?
-How does she change?

Let's apply the above questions to Krista and see what happens.

-Krista wants to feel safe and secure.
-In order to feel secure, she is willing to avoid anything that involves risk.
-She is willing to sacrifice friendships and romance in order to avoid being hurt.
-What she really needs is to come out of her shell.
-Coming out of her shell will put her at risk of having her heart broken.
-Above all else, she values a peaceful, quiet life.
-Her biggest weakness is not allowing herself to trust others.
-She hides this weakness by avoiding social situations.
-She's this way because her parents divorced when she was ten. Her older brother, her closest confidant, sided with her father in the divorce and left to go live with him. Krista could never understand why her brother took her father's side. She felt betrayed. She lost both her father and her brother/best friend at the same time.
-Internally, she's unable to reach her goal of security because she's afraid to risk having her heart broken.
-Externally, she's unable to reach her goal of security because she lives alone and has a job that allows her to work in isolation (instead of an ice cream shop, maybe she's an artist?)
-The event that causes her to change is her work forces her to be in contact with a client/patron/philanthropist. If she refuses to contact this person, she will lose her livelihood. The person she is forced to deal with is unpredictable and difficult and keeps her on her toes.
-Krista changes by gaining confidence in herself. She realizes that even when she's involved in events  (or with people) she can't control, she is resourceful enough to handle the unknown and come out fine. With a little experience under her belt, she is now equipped to take bigger risks in her life.

I spent about 30 minutes on the above. Still not a huge time investment, but there's a lot more meat to work with here than on the previous list. Better questions yield better answers. The answers to these questions even suggest the outline of a story. 

You could make a list of character traits even before you start writing a story, but where this exercise becomes most powerful is when you use it on the characters in a story you've already started, especially a story that has stalled. Often when we're stuck it's because we have yet to make some crucial decisions about what our characters want. Take what you already know about your character and use it to answer the questions. Spend time thinking through their motivations. As if by magic, new plot ideas may suggest themselves and you'll be able to move forward.

Are you stuck on a story? Give this exercise a try. Let me know how it works for you.

Writing and Motherhood

My summer started with such good intentions.

The plan was to get up 1-2 hours earlier than my minions in hopes of getting a little writing done. Getting up early wasn't as difficult as I thought it would be, given that I'm not a morning person. I loved watching the sun rise and finishing the most important task of the day so early. 

The problem began when the minions started getting up even earlier than usual. I, in turn, got up even earlier and went to bed earlier to make up for it. It didn't help. With all the running around from activity to activity and all the meals (why must children eat so much?) I was exhausted. And cranky. In short, sleep won out.

Now, four weeks into summer break I'm back to the haphazard approach of stealing a few moments here and there. I'm just starting to fall behind on my rewriting schedule but trying my best to keep up. I'm attempting to embrace all that summer entails--the messy house, the up-ended schedule, the spontaneous opportunities for fun. All the while, though, my novel simmers on the back burner and I wonder if I'll ever finish by my self-imposed deadline. It's really important to me, so I keep plugging away.

I once met a writer whom I greatly admire and he asked me if I had any children. I told him about my twin girls and how it was difficult for me to be fully present for them and for my writing at the same time. This particular writer had several grown children and sympathized with my situation. "Raise your children first," he said, "then when they're in college, write like crazy."

This isn't the first time I've heard this advice. Over and over again I've been told to put my work aside and focus my energy on raising my girls. The writing, they say, can wait.

I'm sure the author (and others) meant well and had the best of intentions. Perhaps he even thought he was offering me a bit of comfort in the form of permission to not be so hard on myself. I'll admit that his advice did comfort me at first, but then I couldn't help thinking that had I been a male writer, he probably wouldn't have told me to put my career on hold for the next ten years.

Must I choose one over the other? I love being a mother and having the luxury of spending lots of time with my children. I also love being a writer. If I was forced to pick one over the other, I would choose my kids. Thankfully, I don't have to make that choice. Still, there has to be a way I can have both without feeling depleted every single day. Am I asking for too much? Was that author simply stating the truth and I just don't want to hear it?

How do you juggle a writing career and motherhood?